Sunday 28 March 2010

Who am i?

I live in a transparent world. I live in a world where, people as u know them are just people. They will be there for you in time of need and when u dont even need them, but do i really want to live my life, as i am right now. My heart has been broken for a long time and i wish to get rid of the pain yet, deep inside i really dont mind going through this pain to keep the memory alive. I feel sick, i wish things could happen to me instead of others,I wish i had cancer and not my friends girlfriend, i wish i was hit by a car instead of my bestfriend, i wish i could colapse and die from a heart attack. These are the kind of things i wish i could have, because literally i have given up. I'm messed up in so many ways, i portray this guy who everyone can love easily and have around most times, but inside i cant do anything but whimper, because when im alone, i break down and cry, cry like a little baby whose been beaten. I want to be invisible i want to be different but different in a way that no one notices. I feel as though my world is crashing down. At the end of the day with a broken heart its hard to carry on. Life isnt as easy as everyone thinks it is, no in my world its just dark. I wish i was someone else, someone with a perfect life, an easy life, a loved life.

I need a new life.